I was contemplating about the expanse of creepy guys today. I mean, I know there are creepy guys, but is the amount as high as I think? Or do most the guys I meet just give really fucked up first impressions?

I met this male last Friday. Lets call him Mark. I was immediately relieved to start talking to him because a) the guy I was talking to prior to Mark was about 40 years old, b) this said 40 year old was trying to convert me and my Muslim friend to Christianity and c) Mark looked normal. 3 minutes into the conversation he started talking about Two Girls In A Cup, which is indeed a porno…

So I gave him the benefit of the doubt. But soon my friend started talking about the terrifying tentacles of the cracken that shot out at people as they went down the pirate slide. So I replied with, “Uh oh.” And he goes, “Oh, don’t start thinking dirty. Cuz once you start thinking dirty, I won’t be able to stop.”

And… all I could do was stare. I mean how do you tell a person that you were indeed daunted by blow up tentacles slapping you in the face… without him bringing testicles into the mix. And then I started laughing, because I had nothing to say.

So then he got the impression that I thought he was funny… and probably that I liked to “think dirty.”

Anyway, I’m really tired so I’m just going to fall asleep mid-blog…